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What A Man Wants

At the time I (Bill) was writing 7 Simple Skills for Every Man, I had a one-year-old grandson (Now, I have two grandsons!)  Without having to teach him (Grandson #1) , he has a fascination with footballs, basketballs, baseballs, soccer balls—in fact any kind of ball will do.

I took him to visit my son (his dad) at a football practice at the local high school. We walked past the tennis team practicing on the courts. When Rocco heard the “pop” of the first serve, his head snapped around toward the sound just in time to see the yellow projectile skim along the ground. He squealed loudly, “Ooh!” Every serve received the same enthusiastic squeal. When the tennis balls from serving practice got stuck in the chain link fence he danced from ball to ball touching each sphere and laughing in wonder at the sight.

It won’t be long before people start telling him he is being silly. He will be told to calm down, quiet down, and sit down. As a family, we are committed to help him pursue his interests in wise and ambitious ways; but, out in the world, he will be  trying to achieve a set of  “dos”  amidst a chorus of “don’ts.” How many of us men have grown up with more restriction than inspiration?


Men are equipped with an innate desire to live productive lives and pursue vital relationships. Every man wants a career that needs what he has to offer, a woman that thinks he is incredible despite his faults, and an adventure to pursue that captivates the passion he carries in his soul. And we want all three of these to be simple enough that we can succeed.

For men, this is a simple pursuit. We think in clear terms of what we want.

  • “I want a job I enjoy.”
  • “I want to be in love with an interesting and interested woman.”
  • “I want to have good experiences with the people I care about.”
  • “I want to do things that make me feel like a man.”

The world we live in, however, is rugged and unpredictable. Life tends toward the complex and complicated. You will be confronted with a wide range of emotional needs, situational challenges, and unexpected consequences. As things get more complicated, you will notice that your motivation level drops. The complexity creates confusion which makes you feel weak—and men don’t like to feel weak. The more complicated life becomes, the more a man struggles with his motivation to stay interested in his pursuits.

There is good news! There are a few simple skills any man can practice that will enable him to stay on track in life. Even complicated situations can be navigated with simple abilities that keep men strong, focused, and effective. In 7 Simple Skills for Every Man, I share how these simple skills have helped me in my journey and I will challenge you to apply these skills to your everyday life.

My goal is that we will all adopt the attitude of the influential British economist E. F. Schumacher, “Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius — and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.” Let’s make it a goal to simplify success, for our lives and our sons and grandsons!  That is is the aim of 7 Simple Skills for Every Man. 

Let’s move forward with courage.


Bill Farrel is a bestselling author, father of 3 sons, Papa to two grandsons and lifecoach to numerous men.

photo by Rebecca Friendlander

He is a sought after speaker for men’s events like Promise Keepers Canada,  Iron Sharpens Iron and men’s conferences, camps, and church events. As a pastor, who now speaks in pulpits across the nation, his sermons bring practical, biblical and inspirational truth. He makes his home with his wife Pam, on a liveaboard boat docked in So Ca.

This blog is an excerpt from 7 Simple Skills for Every Man, available at Love-Wise (use code DAD by June 19, 2020 for savings)

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