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Q: Pam, your new book, Discovering Hope in the Psalms, is a bible study for women. So how have the Psalms been helpful or hopeful for you and Bill in your marriage?

The Psalms have been our “go to book” of the Bible when we need comfort, guidance and healing. There are several verses in the Psalms that God has used at strategic times in our marriage. Let me share just a few and how they have helped us. We will do this in a series of blogs over the next few weeks:

The Beginnings of Love (Our Psalm of romance!)

Psalm 37:3-6

Trust in the Lord, and do good;
dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.

This is the set of verses God used to guide me in the summer I was deciding to marry Bill. God used each challenge in this Psalm to guide my decisions during those strategic months:

  1. “Do good”- I was impressed to stay focused on ministry to others and not give in to the temptation to make my needs the main priority.
  2. “Dwell in the land”- Bill and I met through our involvement with Campus Crusade (now CRU). It seemed God was telling both of us that our relationship would progress as we both stayed under the umbrella of that ministry. As a result, I signed up for a 6-week Biblical Studies course Cru offered. Much to my surprise, part of the experience included a marriage Prep class taught by Dr Dennis Rainey during the first year of Family Life radio!
  3. “Delight in the Lord and he will give me desires of my heart”- The year BEFORE I met Bill, God had me take a year off dating. I admitted I was addicted to the attention of men which was competing with my love for Jesus. During that year, God led me on a journey through the Bible to see what a godly man looked like. I studied the lives of Jesus, Boaz, Daniel, Joseph and the Disciples. This helped me be better able to discern who was a healthy, emotionally stable, strong Christian man. I made a list of qualities I wanted in a future mate. Then I asked, “Am I those things?” because I know quality attracts quality. I worked hard on healing some of my emotional issues (caused by growing up in a home with domestic violence from an angry, alcoholic dad). When I met Bill, he was all the things I had prayed for and MORE!
  4. “Commit your way”- We dedicated our relationship to God and took the high road in all aspects of our relationship. We agreed not to sleep with each other and not even kiss until Bill would propose. We wanted to stay pure in heart and regret free. We also took the summer to seek God in prayer. For 6 weeks Bill and I didn’t write or phone each other (and no social media back then). We wanted to hear from God if we were called to marry the other.
  5. “Trust in Him and He will act” – during our dating months, Bill wrote relationship questions in a spiral notebook that we “needed” to discuss before we go out on a date. I asked him why he was doing this and he said, “I have never had a Christ based relationship so we need to figure this out together.” So, before we could go bowling or to the beach, we had to answer these relationship questions! This showed me Bill cared greatly about walking in integrity and protecting our budding love. It took until the last day of the six weeks for me to decide and it was in reading Psalms 37 that I was convinced Bill was Mr. Right for me!
  6. “He will bring forth your righteousness like the noon day”- We believed that if God was bringing us together, godly, upright friends and family members would applaud the decision. We also believed God would use our relationship to shine for him, which is what we have seen for 38 years and counting! We were thrilled when our dating “notebook” turned into a Premarital resource to help others decide and prepare well for a successful marriage in The Before You Marry Book of Questions. And our choice to stay pure in body and heart resulted in a lifetime of Red Hot Monogamy!

May God use His Word to guide you through all your vital decisions.

Pam and Bill have been married 38 years and are the authors of 45 books including the updated, expanded best seller Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti and Pam’s newest, Discovering Hope in the Psalms: A Creative Biblical Experience

 

About The Author

Bill and Pam Farrel

Bill and Pam have been married for 37 years. They are the proud parents of three young men, three daughters-in-law and four grandchildren. They have authored 45 books, including their best-seller, Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti.

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Author his web sitehttp://www.love-wise.com

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10 2017

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